(stranger than usual)
I'm not sure why, but I wonder if it has to do with grief.
I find that grief rears it's ugly head every-once-in-awhile, and it's often in autumn.
My dad died 9 years ago today, so that's probably why I've been feeling so moody blue.
I don't cry about him anymore, but I always feel like there is a hole in me where he used to be.
I think about things, like how happy he would have been to meet Storm, and to finally see me in a happy relationship. Or how he would have loved to go with us when we went zip lining and hiking in Fern Canyon. He loved adventures in nature, and passed that on to me.
Elk at Fern Canyon
A glimpse of what was
but yet so far...
They smelled sweet in the fields
in the warm Michigan sun
across from the tall corn rows
we ran through like wild things...
(Michigan seems like a dream to me now)
He's not there,
tho I searched in tears
for his sugar maple tree
in the long, dewy grass.
I just missed it,
and that was the last time
since the Dia de los Muertos dance.
I sent him to the Rhine
and he came back
to a place in my heart
that he never left.